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NASA Is Looking For Someone To Protect The Planet From Aliens

Fort McMurray, AB, Canada / MIX 103.7

NASA is currently searching for their “Planetary Protection Officer” that will protect the planet from alien invasion. Here are my suggestions.

1. Jeff Goldblum 

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He managed to survive multiple interactions with prehistoric monsters in the Jurassic Park series showing that he is perfect for the action hero requirement. He uploaded a virus to an advanced alien computer using Windows 95 in Independence Day which takes incredible smarts. Plus in Earth Girls Are Easy he was in the shoes of an Alien life form so he knows how they think.

2. Neil Degrasse Tyson

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He’s a well-known astrophysicist with an incredibly calming voice. He will be clear a concise when the aliens attack and make sure the whole world doesn’t go into a panic. I’ve never met him but just by watching Cosmos, I trust him with my life. Plus did you see how much he could lift in Brooklyn 99?

3. Sigourney Weaver

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She has first-hand experience with arguably the scariest aliens to ever hit the big screen. She is incredibly smart and has been the sole survivor of multiple alien encounters. Plus she studied the aliens in Avatar so clearly, she knows a thing or two about interplanetary lifeforms

4. Arnold Schwarzenegger

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Not only did he survive through Predator but he also has experience working in government. He was the governor of California from 2003 to 2011. We are talking about a guy who can navigate the political landscape all the while kicking alien butt. It doesn’t get much better than that.

5. Tyler Holowchuk (me)

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I watched every single one of the movies referenced in this list meaning I have some incite into aliens plus I have played multiple video games where I had to fight off alien invaders so I have hands-on experience. I’m a huge nerd for science and I may not be the coolest option in this list but maybe… just maybe, I’m the planetary defence officer we need. (Probably not though. Let me dream)

If you actually fit any of the criteria for the job you can apply here. https://www.usajobs.gov/GetJob/ViewDetails/474414000

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